|Biography of Grieb||
October 1, 2003
I looked through some previous observations and I realized that I never told a classic "Karl" story that happened during my freshman year of college, known as the "egg" incident. This particular event, or series of events, stared during Spring Break of 1991, I think.
I had come home for break, and a friend of mine had a house party. I was looking forward to this party because I hadn't seen a bunch of my high-school buddies in quite some time, and Andy's (the friend) house parties were always fun (if you get a chance, read the observation about New Year's at his house on my old website - http://www.geocities.com/losrulz/home.htm).
The party was great - I was catching up with "old" friends, drinking beer, and playing pool in the basement. I happened to strike up a conversation with this girl, let's call her "Trista." She was a year younger than me, and although I knew her, I never really talked to her before. I guess she was kind of cute, nothing to gush over, but hey - I'm talking to a girl, and things are good. At some point during the conversation - and I honestly don't know how this came up -, but Trista tells me that she enjoys "getting laid" any chance she gets. Obviously, this was a shock to me - it's not quite the conversation one expects when talking to a stranger. I, of course, tell her that it is a noble thing to have these "ambitions," mainly because I wanted to see if I could get some action later in the night.
Our conversation seemingly ended at some point, and she went upstairs. I continued to play pool a little while longer, and then I ventured upstairs to watch the Flyers game. I noticed Trista checking every room in the house, for some reason. Then, she sat on my lap and informed me that all of the rooms were taken, and that if there was a free room, she would give me hummer I ever had. At this point in my life, not many girls had given me a hummer, and even less of those had given me a good hummer, so I was intrigued. I reached into my pocket and pulled out my car keys and said that my car was available. Honestly, I didn't expect her to take me up on the offer, but she started walking towards the door, motioning me to follow.
Well, we went to my car, and got in my back seat, and "took care of business." It is not an easy thing to get pleasured in the back seat of a Hyundai Excel, especially in 25-degree weather, but somehow, she was successful (or, was I successful?). Anyway, we went back to the party, and I don't think I talked to her the rest of the night.
I went back to school, and when the semester was over, I went back to work at the pet shop (trust me, this is connected). A co-worker of mine, let's call him Bob, informed me that he went to the Senior Prom with Trista, and he had a wild night with her in their hotel room afterwards. I decided (probably wrongly) to play a trick on Bob, and mentioned that I had heard that Trista had some sort of "disease." I may have even mentioned that I thought it might have been HIV-related. Of course, Bob, was devastated. I decided not to tell him it was a joke (or maybe I forgot to tell him).
Bob went to school the next day and confronted Trista about her "illness." Trista was obviously shocked by this information, and she demanded he tell her who gave him this false information. He refused "rat" me out, but after she mentioned some names of guys she'd been with, he caved in when it came to my name.
Trista came up to the pet shop the next day and asked to speak with me. I foolishly thought she wanted some more "Vitamin K." I approached her, and she asked me to get closer. I'm thinking that I am the big stud she'd been looking for. Again, she asked me to get closer. Man, this chick must be majorly hot for me, or so I thought. Once more, she asked me to get closer. This time I was about an inch from her face. Then she whacked me over the head with a raw egg.
As she was running out of the pet store - evening up the score I might add, I yelled back at her, "and stay out!."
I hope we all learned a lesson here - and not the lesson of eggs being good for hair!
More house updates, and other funny stories coming soon. Please keep reading!